Video/transcript of audience laughing as Letterman admits to affairs

Good grief. How low can they go?

After a monologue that included more than one Roman Polanski joke — which I found odd given my knowledge of what was coming — act two began with Dave, who was clearly enjoying his audience, saying “I’m glad you folks are here tonight and in such a good mood ….. Do you feel like a story?” (Crowd: Yeahh!!)

So he starts talking about finding the package in the back of his car at 6 a.m. and the note, which read, “I know that you do some terrible, terrible things.” Laughter. “A guy is going to write a screenplay about me … unless I give him some money. … That’s a little hinky!” More laughter.

You can tell Letterman is trying to ratchet up the gravity. He uses the word “terrifying” to describe his response to this extortion letter. Later on he says, “This whole thing has been quite scary.” But for every one of those statements there’s one like this: “If you know anything about me, I am just a towering mass of Lutheran midwestern guilt.” Of course, the crowd laughs. It sounds funny.

The first tipoff to the audience should have been Dave’s statement, “This guy knows creepy stuff about me” –not “this guy thinks he knows creepy stuff about me.”

And then finally, after telling the audience that the suspect, now ID’s as Robert Halderman, had been arrested, applause, finally Dave reveals the allegation in the screenplay: that “I have had sex with women who worked for me on the show.” And….?

“My response to that is, yes, I have,” said Letterman. At this admission, the audience laughs and then rolls into applause.

Here’s the video:

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, considering this is the same country that excused Bill Clinton’s, ahem, numerous marital ‘indiscretions’ while President. It’s saddening all the same, though, to watch our cultural decline in living color.

That said, I agree with other bloggers on the issue of extortion – it’s wrong and no one should have to go through it. But if Letterman had kept his marital vows he wouldn’t be in this situation to begin with.

I should also note that while extortion is clearly wrong, I feel very little sympathy for Letterman. He’s an adulterous slug who made the personal choice to have affairs with members of his staff. He’s also a jerk who has contempt for women – especially conservative women. He’s also a flaming hypocrite who has made “jokes” in the past about the the personal failings of others, personal failings that included infidelity.

They say that sometimes, what comes around goes around. But for David Letterman, I’m not so sure. Considering his audience thought his admission was “funny” and considering how Hollyweird views sex scandals involving one of their own, he might just emerge from this scandal unscathed, another “misunderstood” hero of sorts.

No doubt he’s thanking his lucky stars that he’s a liberal comedian. The only question left is: Will Whoopi Goldeberg view what he did as simply a few “affairs” or will she view them as “affairs-affairs”? :-?

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