North Korea: Dictator executes ex-girlfriend for doing porn, owning Bible

Posted by: Phineas on August 29, 2013 at 2:35 pm

**Posted by Phineas

"I've got some bad news, boss..."

“She did what??”

I’ve figured it out: North Korea is the only nation founded on a bad acid trip:

Kim Jong-un’s ex-girlfriend was among a dozen well-known North Korean performers who were executed by firing squad on Aug. 20, reports said Wednesday.

Sources in China said singer Hyon Song-wol as well as Mun Kyong-jin, head of the Unhasu Orchestra, were arrested on Aug. 17 for violating North Korean laws against pornography and were executed in public three days later.

The victims of the atrocity were members of the Unhasu Orchestra as well as singers, musicians and dancers with the Wangjaesan Light Music Band.

They were accused of videotaping themselves having sex and selling the videos. The tapes have apparently gone on sale in China as well.

A source said some allegedly had Bibles in their possession, and all were treated as political dissidents.

According to reports (and we don’t know how reliable they are), Mun and her colleagues were mowed down by a machine-gun firing squad, which I suppose is merciful compared to dropping a mortar round on top of the condemned. And, really, who among us hasn’t at some time, however briefly, fantasized about doing the same to a pain-in-the-neck ex?

The families of the victims were all sent to North Korea’s hellish gulag, par for the course for the world’s largest prison camp masquerading as a nation.

It is good to be King psycho-dictator.

At first glance, the “porn and Bible” angle made me think this was some sort of fake, but it does make a weird sort of sense. Think about it: you live in a police state that takes most of your income and rations how much food you get. You get more than most, but you want more. Well, porn sells.

Plus, and here’s where the Bible comes in, these are acts of rebellion and defiance. Could it be that the sex-videos and Bibles were some weird equivalent to a teen “acting out” against a parent, giving them a sense, however fleeting, of a bit of freedom and individuality? We’ll never know. But, in an atheistic, puritanical, Confucianist-Stalinst state, both uncontrolled sex and religion threaten the totalitarian rule of the individual by the government — they become thought-criminals, a la 1984, and have to be destroyed.

In this case, instead of being grounded, they were shot and their families swept into non-existence.

Final thought: North Korea has to be one of the most thorough internal-surveillance states on the planet. I find it very hard to believe that no one knew this was going on and that it didn’t get back to Dear Leader III before now. As a friend asked, did Kim know, but tolerated it until the new wife found out and demanded “something be done?”

Again, we’ll never know, but anything twisted is possible in North Korea. Especially if it’s twisted.

(Crossposted at Public Secrets)

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10 Responses to “North Korea: Dictator executes ex-girlfriend for doing porn, owning Bible”

Comments

  1. Jesse Garrett says:

    Hmm. I know the Asians are supposed to be “inscrutable,” but this sounds more inscrutable than most. I appreciate Phineas’ attempt to put ends together, but it still smells funny. Is there actually a porn industry in N. Korea??? I would like to see examples of what they call porn. If I’m an EX-girlfriend of Un & I know the penalty for porn is death, and my crime is going to be recorded, copied, and sold. I must be really dumb to do it anyway.

    My take away is that you can skip the porn part of the story. I think Mun became an “ex” because someone snitched that she discussed Christianity at some time. Then when she was caught with a Bible, it was over. True or not, God have mercy on Mun & her family.

  2. ALman says:

    Note to Miley Cyrus:

    Maybe, there’s still hope for you. So, if Kim Jong-un’s gives you a call, you just might want to refuse it!

  3. Drew the Infidel says:

    I wonder if the Korean rendition of “twerking” is anything like Gangnam.

  4. Steve Skubinna says:

    I never wished harm upon my ex. All I ever wanted was that she’d move out of WA back to the People’s Republic of Ecofornia. But death? No way.

    Guess that makes me unqualified to be dictator of North Korea. Okay, can you tell that this is my disconsolate face? Because it totally is.

  5. TomTB says:

    How did socialism communism marxism devolve into a heredity based dictatorship anyway? I thought that was what they wanted to get rid of when they ousted the last czars and emperors…

  6. Carlos says:

    Dear Leader must be drooling over this story this morning, pining away that he can’t have the same power, swift, sure and secret, that the nearly-child emperor of NK has.

    Yet.

  7. ST says:

    Steve wrote:

    I never wished harm upon my ex. All I ever wanted was that she’d move out of WA back to the People’s Republic of Ecofornia. But death? No way.

    Guess that makes me unqualified to be dictator of North Korea. Okay, can you tell that this is my disconsolate face? Because it totally is.

    HA! :))

  8. ST says:

    Drew wrote:

    I wonder if the Korean rendition of “twerking” is anything like Gangnam.

    I shudder to think …

  9. ST says:

    Tom wrote:

    How did socialism communism marxism devolve into a heredity based dictatorship anyway? I thought that was what they wanted to get rid of when they ousted the last czars and emperors…

    You ask wayyyyy too many questions, sir. I may have to contact the IRS … ;)

  10. Lori says:

    We can only hope that these girls read the Bibles in their possession and are now in the arms of Jesus.