Media critic. Invader of
SJW safe spaces.
I never respond to spam email, but tonight, I thought I’d give it a try – after all, they can’t ALL mean nasty and vulgar things, can they? I mean, the email headlines may really not mean what we think it does. Examples:
“Get lucky every night.”
Yeah? You mean like with the lottery or bingo? I’m game! What do I need to do?
“Satisfy her all night long.”
Does that mean he’ll finally start wearing nasal strips? Excellent! Now I can finally get some sleep.
Ooooh! Could this finally be the $1,000,000 anonymous PayPal donation I’ve been dreaming about?
“Make her notice you in a whole new way.”
Wha? You mean flowers will be on my kitchen table when I get home, and the dishes washed and put away, and clothes folded, and a glass of wine waiting? Believe me, I’ll notice that!
“Look younger in five minutes!”
Save it! I already know the wonders that Blanche DuBois-style lighting will do for woman’s face, thank you veruh much.
“Get rid of junk email forever.”
Any you’d like to add?