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Audacity of Truth
Breaking news: Spider holds ST hostage in her own home (WEDS/THURS OPEN THREAD)
I wanted to take a bit of a break from politics to tell you about the tense hostage situation going on in my home.
First, I don’t know if I’ve admitted it on this blog before, but I am very afraid of spiders. Have been since I was very young. I’m one of those people you would find standing on a chair if it was the only thing between me and a spider getting too close. In fact, that happened fairly recently. Earlier this year (or was it last year?), I had the exterminator who takes care of the exterminating at my work come out and get rid of a spider and its web which was right there at my kitchen window. He informed me afterwards that it was one of the “friendly” variety of spiders, to which I responded that I have never seen a spider that looked “friendly.”
This past weekend as I was walking out my back door to take out the garbage, I noticed what distinctly looked like the beginnings of a spider web being woven in between my backyard storage room and my neighbors. There was a long vertical line on my side on the top corner of the building, but on my neighbor’s side I noticed that the web was a lot more intricate. Quickly scanning to see if the spider was in sight and not seeing it, I dashed back into the house and got the broom, and used the broomstick to pull down the web. Mission accomplished.
Or so I thought.
I looked back over to my neighbor’s side a short time later to see the web hanging, and the spider walking down it – presumably to assess the damage. Figuring that I had done enough damage to it that he wouldn’t be able to reweave it, I went on about my daily business. Well, the next morning when I opened up the blinds I looked over … and there the blasted thing was. He had not rebuilt it exactly as he had originally, but instead had built the web from the top corner of my neighbor’s storage building to (I think) the property line right there between my townhome and his, creating sort of a “triangle.” For the last three nights, I have wanted to go out onto my back porch, only to see that spider is still hanging out – literally – in the same spot.
Tonight, when I tried to be brave and actually opened the back door, he started walking towards me. And I don’t think he wanted to be my friend. I froze for a second and then collected my wits and ran back inside. So, in effect, this bleeping spider is holding me hostage in my own home, preventing me from going out the back door. Earlier this week, I thought about asking my neighbor to kindly do something about it, but had second thoughts, thinking that eventually the thing would blow or go away. But it hasn’t.
So tomorrow, I shall ask.
Ok, so now that I’ve made this deep confession about my fear of spiders, I know there are tons of you out there who will take this opportunity to reveal that you, too, have a strong aversion to the creepy crawlies 
And for those who don’t, this is, as the title suggests, an open thread, so feel free to post whatever you’d like to talk about.
Update I: LOL! I see this post has been linked up at Memeorandum as a one of their three “featured posts” of the moment … so hello if you’re visiting here from there – and thanks, BCB, for the concern 
Update II: I wanted to add a few links to this post:
—- Mike at The Monkey Centre has blogged about the latest attempt by UK “leaders” to rewrite British history. Why would they want to do that, you may ask? Because they want to make sure it includes more “positive contributions” to history that Muslims have made. It reminds me of a story I blogged about earlier this year concerning British teachers who were not teaching the Holocaust out of fear of “offending” Muslim students. The British are clearly studying up on how to teach Dhimmitude 101 to the next generation.
—- Tim Blair has even more on the those who fell for the media’s spin on Bush’s comment about there being no more Mandelas because “Saddam Hussein killed all the Mandelas.”
—- A mistrial has been declared in the murder trial of Phil Spector. If you’ve been following it, do you think he’s guilty or innocent?
—- The underhanded nature of MoveOn money man George Soros has been revealed to be even more extensive. Investor’s Business Daily has the story. Read more on that here. (h/t: ST readers Sev and Fat Tone).
—- Steve Milloy of JunkScience.com has upped his original offer of $100,000 to $125,000 to anyone who can conclusively prove that global warming is man-made.
—- Related to global warming, the Goracle and Bubba are back together again, this time time calling for a “global Marshall plan” to combat so-called “man-made global warming.”
—- Weird: A student carrying a rifle was arrested today on the St. John’s campus. What was he wearing? A GWB mask.
—- Jim at bRight and Early, one of my first friends I made in the blogosphere, is going through a bit of a rough time and could use some help. Go here to find out why and how you can.
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Love ya ST! I was having a pretty tense day, and this was just what I needed: a nice distraction to make me smile.
And yes, I too hate spiders. You are not alone.
I know people who are afraid of spiders so I won’t try to talk you out of it.
But I would ask you to consider a couple of things.
One is that the spider is almost certainly a “she”. Males are usually the after-the-main-event snack.
The other is, the kind of spider you are talking about if left unmolested will eat an enormous number of things that really do want to hurt you.
And if you have to go out of your way to to hurt the spider you really are not playing fair.
Heh…you and my dive instructor have the same phobias. She was deathly afraid of spiders too. She’d been bitten twice by brown recluses, which are definitely a nasty bug, so she had reason to be gunshy.
Remember, pesticides are your friend, but so is a rolled up newspaper. It’s amazing how much bug spray it takes to really kill a spider though, they seem much more resistant.
Now, how will your boss at the ol’9-5 react when you tell them you can’t come to work because of a spider?
Good luck ST, if I were up there I’d come stomp him for you!
I leave them alone in bushes, trees and for the most part yards.
But my house is my turf.
LOL Sev – this spider is up high enough that a rolled up newspaper won’t work. He’s just at a weird angle that makes it difficult to do anything without fear he’s (she’s?) going to jump off that thing into your face! Thanks for the offer of help, though
Karl – glad you liked the story … that’s one of the reasons I share with ya’ll my little at-home dramas, because I need a little relief myself sometimes from the tension that comes from being a political junkie
Larry, why should I play fair with a spider? He/she certainly doesn’t play fair with me
Adios, Larry. –ST
Larry got rude over a spider?
LOL
Hollywood is at it again. A new movie coming out “Rendition” is about how the U.S. kidnaps people and sends them to other governments to be tortured in the war on terror. Big shocker.
Where’s Hollywood’s movie on how Slick Willy was too busy with interns to protect the nation. What a great movie that would make.
(before I vanish again for several weeks….)
Spider holds ST hostage in her own home
I blame global warming. And the Bush tax cuts. And the war in Iraq – our soldiers need to be sent home immediately to deal with the Vast Right-Wing Spider Menace rather than fighting overseas to steal … aw … you know the rest already.
When I was moving out of my old place, I found a nice black widow under the sink. It met it’s end via a shoe. There was no diplomacy. I didn’t wait for the great unwashed to make their way down to the South Bay from San Francisco to protest my actions. I didn’t go to the UN and request resolutions. Spider, meet shoe, dead.
ST,
There are a few tiny spiders in my apartment. They spin their webs in the corners, and they snag flies and roaches. I consider them friendly insects, therefore.
But that’s not much of a comfort to you, I know. So I’ll just hope for an early frost down your way–unlikely as that is, since tt’s still summer here in New York. A few leaves have turned, but not very many.
Any chance you can get that exterminator to come back?
Karl states:
My thoughts exactly!
Same rules too.
They stay outside, fine. You come in my house or off my house your dead meat (especially IN the house).
Only bad situation I had with a spider was last year I believe, when a big brown or black spider was crawling across the living room floor, seemed to be speckled with white…..
Well those speckles weren’t exactly speckles as I found out when I swatted it and all the white speckles jumped off and started running over the floor also.
SHEESH!!
Vaccuum cleaner made short work of that little problem, but damn!!! Never figured a spider to be carrying all those lil ones on its back….
[shudders]
I guess it’s better than my younger years when I was out with a can of hairspray and a bic lighter toasting spiders……
Bug spray may not do the trick very well, but you only need a quick squirt of flame and they toast up real nice….
Oh pluh-eeze save me from the spiders are people too and do so much to do this or that. If they keep their furry butts outside thats fine, inside your furry butt is squished.
I can remember one time, when I was in jr. high, a buddy and I were going hiking in the woods behind the school. It bordered a large unincorporated bit of forest, and it was always a good tromp on a weekend. We’d pack up lunch and hike for hours.
So, we get into this part near the school, lots of trees and such, and suddenly notice that the whole place is just lousy with these things called banana spiders. Their leg span is about as big as your hand, bodies up to 3 inches long, bright yellow and black colored. Well, we look up, and we are surrounded, the trees are just thick with webs, with a huge monster hanging in the middle of each of them. Aaaaah! AAAAAAAAAH! Did I say AAAAHHH!?
I ordinarily don’t mind spiders, but there were just so damned many of them, and we couldn’t move without hitting webs, we just about freaked. We had to squat down and practically crawl forever to get out of the web tomb as we called it.
Went back with BB guns and got revenge though, if you hit them just right you could blow the bodies away and leave the legs hanging. So, we got our revenge, but sheese, that was really creepy for a while.
BB guns, Sev? Ya gotta be kidding me – I have a Marlin 1895G, in .45-70, and I shoot Buffalo Bore magnum rounds in it – 430 grains at 1900 fps. The gun was designed for Alaskan hunting guides to use against bear at close quarters.
I figure it’d work just as well on a spider. One of those creepy arachnids gives me guff, and it’s Hello, Mister Marlin!
Yeah, I dislike spiders too. But they won’t hold me hostage – I’ll call in an air strike soon as look at ‘em.
ST,
If you can manage a daring escape, head to your local hardware store and pick up a can of wasp & hornet spray. Most of these products employ a special valve that will project a stream about 20 feet, so you can neutralize the threat from a comfortable distance. Good luck and Godspeed.
Don’t hate me because I think spiders can be beatuful:
Silk Stalkings
. . . beautiful, that is. Happy Halloween!
Spiders fall into my category with snakes, the only good one is a dead one, I’m sorry but thats just the way I feel peta.
Mistress, the reason that spidey is determined to reclaim the area (where you tore down his web) is because he’s deemed it’s a good trapping spot. If there were no creepier and crawlier things thereabouts, he’d leave in search of better turf.
I know they’re icky, but spideys are our friends, and take care of lots and LOTS of less desireable bugs (especially mosquitos and other biting insects). I’m always kind of glad to see ‘em out in the yard and in the flower beds. Inside is a different story, though. If they spin a tiny web in an isolated corner, I leave ‘em alone (reasoning they wouldn’t be there if there was no food for ‘em to snare). But if they get in my space, I’ll try to grab ‘em with a kleenex and toss ‘em outside. The less cooperative ones get flushed, however.
This presumes that Flyser! doesn’t spot ‘em
first…..
Well, gosh, I guess we’ll hear all the anti-war liberals go after the dems now:
Dems Discuss Iraq Withdrawal at New Hampshire Debate
But how can this be? Certainly the dems would not waste the lives of American soldier’s over a war they have deemed a quagmire, disaster, and failure…right?
Senator Clinton, you have been a big critic of Bush and the war, even though you voted in favor of the use of force. So now that you feel the war is failing, surely you will immediately withdraw all troops if elected, right?
Oh, I see Senator. Well, Mr. Edwards you voted for the war as well, but now that you are running for president and have also declared the war a failure and you are so concerned about the “common man”, I know that you will withdraw all the troops, right?
Hmmmm, I see a trend here. However, Senator Obama, you voted AGAINST this war and have been under the opinion that it was a mistake from the word go. I am sure that you will withdraw our troops from this huge mistake, right?
So basically, you are all bashing President Bush for not doing what you yourselves would not do, is that correct?
Hypocrisy is an amazing thing.
LOL! I mailed a GWB mask back to one of the soldiers I had worked with when I was home on leave one year. He wore it around when they went to the Iraqi police stations. He said the Iraqi policemen went wild! They all wanted to have their picture taken shaking the soldier’s hand as he wore the mask.
And, lastly, THE YANKEES MADE THE PLAYOFFS!!!!!!!!
WOO HOO!!!!!! Hey, give me a break, considering the way they started this year, I didn’t think they would finish at .500 much less make the playoffs.
Now, if they can only avoid playing the Anaheim Angels, who have SPANKED the Yankees every time they have played them in the last 5 years!!!!
Oh well, good luck to all the teams!!! MLB PLAYOFF TIME!!!!!!!
Here’s an interesting story:
Report: Saddam Sought Exile, $1 Billion Before War
Now why would Saddam Hussein want to take information on WMD’s with him? I mean, he didn’t have any right?
Let me guess, he was going into exile into…Syria perhaps?
You can file this as “OMG you have to be kidding” or “Thought Police in Action”.
Link
Can you say “dismissal”???
Not sure about all the details of that incident, but sadly enough there are people in this country who should not be wearing a badge.
Poor Sissy, does she need a big bad man around to shooo away those evil spiders??? If so please call Lorica @ 309…….
– Lorica
This just in:
Washington, D.C., Judge Issues Bench Warrant for Cindy Sheehan
Judge, didn’t you hear? Cindy’s above the law. She’s fighting for the overthrow of our goverment, she can’t be bothered with your draconian laws!!!!!
Besides, you’re just going to give her a $25 fine anyway, so why bother.
The madness continues:
Colorado Students Walk Out During Pledge, Recite Own Version
Better and better my friends. Boulder is quickly catching up with San Francisco as the premiere liberal indoctrination center.
This just in….
Leftie Girls are….EASY.
Link
Well, sanity, we have it on record that feminists will provide oral sex to keep abortion legal. So there’s a slam dunk.
The catch is, I think it’s only Bill Clinton they provide the oral sex to.
Anyway, the biggest problem with going home with lefty girls (taking one home is out of the question for me unless I cover up all my bookshelves – and I guess my DVDs too – and for sure my ship models and photos – and definitely my gun safe) is that whatever you do, eventually you are going to have to, er, talk with them. I hate to be indelicate, but there’s no nice way to say it. Sooner or later you have to have a conversation with them.
And you and I both know nobody wants that.
The kitties pretty much take care of any spiders that are foolish enough to venture inside the house.
Just don’t ask me about the time I was jumping out of the car even before I had skidded to a complete stop in the grassy median of a four-lane highway because a bee got in the window, yikes!